Wednesday, November 5, 2014

54 Years...

Today is my parents' 54th wedding anniversary. I feel for my Mom as this is the first "milestone" of many she will have to face this coming year.

I still expect to see him when I go to the apartment. Can still hear his voice when I do something that would've generated a reaction out of him. I cannot get into my new car without hearing him tell me it is a station wagon because he knew that drove me nuts!

Still miss him so much it hurts. I know time will lessen the pain, but I truly hope it doesn't. Not that it would mean I've forgotten him, but only that I want to remember how important he is in my life and to remind me that whatever pain I am going through, Mom's has to be so much worse.

I am taking Mom out with her friends this evening. Mom and Dad were supposed to be on a cruise to celebrate their anniversary. She cancelled the trip when he got sick, but today is going to be tough on her.

I'm having trouble not crying as I sit here and it's not my anniversary. I know I have a guardian angel in him, but I'd rather still have him here with us.